Yikes! All that glitters is not GOLD on Carnival anymore!

So earlier this week Carnival announced changes to its member travel rewards program known as the "VIFP" Program. It was announced that Gold members of the program would no longer be invited to the traditional "Past Guest Party" which would be held on cruises of 5 days or longer. Starting in mid-May this event would be for Diamond and Platinum members only. Carnival Brand Ambassador, John Heald, stating that the reason for the change was due to the sheer volume of Gold members on any given cruise. Citing that ships have begun holding two events just to accommodate the number of Gold and up cruisers. For those who aren't in the know the "Past Guest Party" was one of the events many cruisers looked forward to on a cruise. At this event you were entitled to an open drink program and the drinks flowed freely! (Let's be honest… this IS a staple of the cruise world whether or not you are a heavy drinker!) In lieu of being invited to this party, now Gold cruisers will receive a drink coupon (up to a $9 value) which can be used at any bar on the ship…on the last day of the voyage. This resulted in a furor from MANY Carnival cruisers who took to the internet and to Brand Ambassador Heald to express their disdain for this latest development.  

The general sentiment being that Gold cruisers were not valued for their brand loyalty anymore. And to be fair, in order to achieve Gold status, you do have to have 25 cruise days under your belt. Which can be between 4-6 cruises for many. This is a pretty solid investment and it stands to reason that taking away one's perks is a poor way for a company to express its appreciation. Especially when you consider that Gold is a fairly long level to get through. One stays Gold from 25 days at sea all the way until they pass 74 days. The Past Guest Party was also seen as the biggest perk of this particular level. At this level you got to go to the party and enjoy an open bar, and you are also given a gold pin on each sailing.

I can begin to understand my fellow cruiser's anger at being told "Hey, you are no longer exclusive enough to come to our open-bar party, but here's a coupon for a single drink in exchange… this is equitable right?!" And let's also remember this comes not long after Carnival announced only a few months ago that they also did away with the free drink coupon that could be used for an alcoholic beverage at brunch (but HAD to be used in the Main Dining Room). The coupon was replaced by a free bottle of water in your cabin. These changes are understandably irritating to many.

As I mentioned, the internet has erupted and John Heald has clearly heard the masses and their overall opinion on the change. Promising that this feedback is being passed along to the 'beards' or those in charge of these changes. While I don't condone some of the language and manners in which this anger was expressed (often no better than six year old children throwing a tantrum), my question becomes- if Carnival was to decide to toss us Gold cruisers (of which I am one) a proverbial bone, what would a good, reasonable, equitable perk be for Gold members to receive instead of the Past Guest Party?

Some thoughts I had:

1)      Discounted or Free (once per cruise) Steakhouse dinner

2)      One free bag of laundry

3)      One free drink per day

4)      Free 8x10 portrait

5)      Free Bingo entry

Something that truly wouldn't cost the cruise line that much, wouldn't over or under value the Gold member's, but feel like a fitting replacement for an event that was busting at the seams. I put it to you my fellow cruisers- What do you believe would be a reasonable way for Carnival to show it's gratitude for the loyalty of its Gold level members?

The Media Machine- What happened to just reporting?

Folks- today I would like to talk about the growing trend in the media of sensationalism. The practice of taking reporting the news to a level that diminishes the actual 'news' and delivers a 'story'. And there is an important distinction there. News' is defined as "information about recent events or developments." Meanwhile 'Story' can be defined as "a factual or fictional account of an event or series of events." This can further also be defined as "the plot of a novel, play, motion picture, or other narrative work." The reason I point this out is because we now live in an age where we need to be drawn in. We are a culture that only keeps reading or listening if we are affected or connecting on a personal or emotional level. News in and of its self isn't flashy. News in the 21st century is competing to draw in viewers that would sooner checkFacebook on their smartphone for some quick news blurbs rather than pull out a newspaper or wait for the eleven o'clock news.

trend in the media of sensationalism. The practice of taking reporting news to a level that diminishes the actual 'news' and delivers a 'story'. And there is an important distinction there. '

As such news has risen to the attention-seeking challenge and goes into over-drive affecting your psychological responses to what it's reporting. While this isn't only an issue relating to the Cruise industry, I have noted that ever since the infamous 'Poop Cruise' of the Carnival Triumph, the media goes into warp speed when it comes to reporting on any story involving something negative aboard a cruise ship. Take this recent headline regarding the Carnival Spirit and storms it endured in Australia earlier this week: "Passengers speak of terrifying ordeal on battered Carnival Spirit" - Daily Mail 4/22. And in case you missed this story, the Carnival Spirit was on its way back from a 12 day itinerary to Sydney. Unfortunately the Sydney harbor was being rocked by a pretty severe storm which caused the port to shut down for the day. This caused the Spirit to have to ride out the storm outside the harbor. Now I don't mean to suggest this wasn't a pretty bad storm- there were 40 foot swells and heavy winds up to 85mph. For your average cruise passenger I'm sure it was quite a negative experience. After all most of us are used to a smooth sailing and ships that usually have the option to track around a storm instead of right into it. However the thing to understand is that ships are built to endure far more than we give them credit for. In the case of the Spirit, the captain had to await till the port would reopen when the storm abated. His ship was obviously up to the challenge. Had he feared for the safety of his ship, crew, and guests, obviously he would have sailed away. Words like 'battered' in the title are used to set the scene. You had waves crashing against the hull of the ship. Again I'm sure to many this was a little disconcerting. When you continue to read the article is where it gets worse. "4000 passengers and crew trapped for two days on cruise liner smashed by 40ft waves as epic storms battered Australia relive ordeal after boat finally limped to port." Now if this doesn't paint a picture to make you fear cruising ever again, I don't know what will. The ship was 'smashed' by waves implies the hull began to buckle. The boat 'limped' to port implies that she lost power or engine capacity of some sort and barely made it to the dock with the engines sputtering. But I suppose it makes for a more interesting read than "After braving the storm for an extra day, the ship cruised into port under full power. Many reportedly got seasick."

One can't even accuse them of misrepresenting the facts because the facts are there- buried under the tinsel of an exciting adventure story. What it is though is a purely sensational version of what happened. It was designed to evoke compassion for the poor passengers who endured a LOT more rocking than they were used to. It was designed to make you question the safety of cruising which has been a hot button issue in recent times. With events like the Splendor fire, the Triumph incapacitated, the fire aboard the Grandeur of the Seas, and most notably- the sinking of the Costa Concordia. But in light of all those events I almost think the Spirit should be painted in a better light. Here is a ship that got into a tussle with Mother Nature, she took some hits, and kept on ticking! I don't want to downplay the discomfort of the passengers, with larger than usual waves slapping the hull I'm sure it was a bit off-putting and resulted in a lot of seasickness. But the ship didn't lose power, she didn't lose engines, or control of herself, hot food continued to be served, passengers still had the option to be entertained. I think the best of a bad day was made and the Spirit should be applauded, not made a terror subject.

In today's reporting I just believe you need to be able to cut through some of the theatrics of story-telling to really understand what happened. And this is not just a problem when reporting on the cruise industry, but in all news anymore. Sensationalism is what gathers viewers and readers, but if you're not aware of it you can be easily sucked into the predetermined view of the reporting without the benefit of allowing yourself to think about on your own. It's very much the same in cruising with folks that read cruise reviews on Cruise Critic and only use them to decide if they will sail a ship or not. As a society I think it's important to not be spoon-fed our opinions but endeavor to find out for ourselves what is what.

With that I will now remove myself from my soap box! Thanks for reading everybody!

Life at Sea, like in Real Estate, is all about Location Location Location!

Without a doubt one of the first things that can sink a cruise is realizing you picked (or were assigned) a less than ideal cabin. I've read reviews for years where a cruise was completely ruined for vacationers simply because of their cabin location. Whether it be the sounds from cooks in the galley, or you have a night club right beneath you, a game of basketball going on above you, a Broadway show taking place beneath you, or the dreaded crying child next door. The possibilities for a bad cabin are endless, now for some it's a simple case of 'Grin and bear it'. For other's it's going to result in a nasty-gram to the cruise line… who let's face it- will send a stock apology letter and continue counting their billions.

This is a classic buyer beware scenario. Now however if you are the type that isn't bothered by noise, or you are out being part of the party until the wee hours… well you can probably cease reading here! However for those who want a few tips when planning and picking their ideal cabin here are some things to note.

AVOID The Following: Cabins right above the main theater/comedy club/ship's disco/main galley. These cabin's will undoubtedly have a certain amount of noise associated with whatever event is taking place beneath them. If you are a fan of staying on deck 1 you may just want to beware of the possibility that your cabin may lie directly above the Crew Lounge, which is the scene of nightly 'morale boosting events' And from what I understand the crew knows how to get the party started better than most of us can ever hope to!

Likewise AVOID The following: Cabins right below the main lido deck in general, but specifically where lounge chairs reside. In the early morning hours deck hands begin sliding loungers around the deck to prepare for the days sunbathers. You will also want to avoid being below the gym as folks tend to drop free weights and forget that jogging in place above you comes across to you as a stampede abandoning ship!

So once all of these major locations are checked off your list, here are a few other things to consider:

-          Families with children tend to stay towards the Forward end of the ship as it often provides easy access to Children programs such as Camp Carnival, Night Owl's, Club 02, etc. This also is prime location for quick access to the gym/spa, or down a few decks to the main show lounge.

-          Cabin's on any floor near the stairways or elevator banks are both convenient, but also potentially hot spots for sound.

-          Be careful of cabin's that share a wall with an elevator shaft or maintenance closet (usually shown on deck plans as empty non-labelled rooms).

-          For quieter spots go Aft down the corridor as far from the stairs/elevators as possible. Many who love the action want to be near easy access spots. So walking far down a corridor is not for them.

With all of this in mind, when I'm booking my cabin for a cruise I tend to stay Mid-ship towards Aft or in the Aft section. I prefer deck's sandwiched between two other 'residential' decks so as not to absorb entertainment sounds (Most ships this will be decks 6 or 7). And for some reason I have this non-sensical superstition that I have to be on the Port side of the ship. (Don't ask I have no valid reason for feeling this way!)

Lastly just remember these tips apply to all cabins, so don't risk thinking "Well I paid for a suite so it will be perfect". You can pay for a suite and it can be poorly located! So whether you're staying in an Interior, Ocean View, Balcony, or Suite… play with the deck plans a little bit to determine the best spot for you based on what your personality is, and what you most want to be able to get quick access to on your vacation! Sadly… I have no tips for avoiding noisy neighbors!

Thanks again for reading!

Disconnect at sea? Or Connect Me!

In the major motion pictures "Star Trek: Generations" there is a scene in the beginning of the film in which Captain Jean-Luc Picard and his First Officer, William Riker, are celebrating the recent promotion of crew member Worf aboard a holodeck representation of a 19th century sailing vessel. Gazing across the water the two have the following exchange,

Picard: "Will, ... just imagine what it was like. No engines. No computers. Just the wind and the sea and the stars to guide you."

Riker: "Bad Food. Brutal discipline. ... No women!

Picard: After being advised he was receiving a communication, "... The best thing about a life at sea was that no one could reach you. This was freedom, Will."

While we are still sailing the seven sea's aboard nautical vessels and not shooting through space aboard starships, we have begun to enter an age where it is becoming increasingly easier to connect and communicate with those back home. Recently Carnival announced enhancements to its internet connectivity programs for guests. In the past if you did wish to connect home it required a pretty significant investment in the form of paying for internet minutes, and connecting to a service so slow it made you fondly remember the days of dial-up on services such as America Online (AOL)! On one particular cruise my fiancé and I were in the midst of buying a home and had to check e-mails daily to provide information to the mortgage lender. All told I think we spent $45 to send and receive about six e-mails! (That's how slow these satellite connections were!) But I digress!

As I mentioned Carnival has begun to rollout their new solutions for internet connectivity for their guests, and if you are anything like me, you heard bits and pieces about the Social Network Package or something about a new App you could download on your smartphone and use to communicate to your fellow cruisers at sea! So I did a bit of investigating to find out just exactly what is being offered on a cruise ship near you!

The Internet Package's-  (As near as I can tell any prices I came across were for youraverage 7 day cruise)

Social Media Package: This is offered for $5/day or $25/cruise

This I expect will be the most popular offering as it provides guests unlimited access to your favorite social media websites such as Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, etc. Allowing all the connectivity junkie's going through withdraw for a week to stay connected to their world and to upload pictures and tell everyone back home about the massive bar tab they accumulated at Senor Frogs!  

The Value Package: Offered for $16/day or $60/cruise

So if social networking isn't all you care about when you connect, this is the package for you. In addition to having access to your favorite social networks, this package offers you full access to the internet. So if you want to log on to your financial institution to raid your children's college fund to pay off your casino or bar tabs, this is the package for you! However you will not be able to access your favorite music streaming sites such as Pandora or iHeart Radio with this package. For those services you would need…

The Premium Package: Offered for $25/day or $99/cruise

With this package the digital world is again your oyster! Carnival boasts that this package provides you connectivity at 3x the speed of the Value (and I assume Social Media) package. This means you not only can post your latest duck-lipped drink of the day selfie, but NOW you can Skype with your friends back home while guzzling down a frosty Shade-Ade and panning the camera around the lido deck making them feel inadequate for still being at home in the rain and cold!

In addition to the internet packages, Carnival has also developed a free to download App available on both iOS and Android platforms. It is called Carnival Huband it offers the following:

-Day by Day schedule of events onboard. Need to find where 80's sitcom Trivia is being held? Now you know! This feature is essentially a digital "Fun Times" that you can access on your phone or tablet. You won't need to carry around the tear-off schedule from your nightly Fun Times anymore.

- "Favorites" feature that allows guests to see what events and activities fellow guests are participating in. I'm not entirely sure how this functions but I suspect you click into "Punchliner with Kevin Hart (I wish) and see what other Hub users have clicked that they are "going" to this event. (Think: Facebook Events)

- Information on casual dining options. I'm guessing the menu for the night's Lido deck, Sushi, etc.

- Searchable deck-plans with key areas highlighted. Can't find Cherry on Top? Or the "Inch of Gold Sale" outside the Fun Shops? Now you can pull out this handy app and have your intuitive map of the ship to guide you. (Think: Ship Mate App)

- Itinerary Details, current ship time, arrival/departure times for upcoming ports. This is a handy feature, however if you're like me you've already committed the itinerary and times to memory weeks or months before you even embarked!

-Access to your current Sail and Sign account. Truly leaving you no good reason not to have a clue how much you've spent on your week of excess! You now have access to your Sail and Sign account on your in-cabin TV, the new(ish) Sail and Sign Kiosks located around the ship, and NOW in your pocket!

In addition to all these handy features, I think the true brilliance of this app is for a flat $5 fee (for the entire week) you can also send and receive text messages from fellow guests also using the app through the ship's Wi-Fi. Very similar to Facebook Messenger. No longer do you need to mess with post-it's playing a ship-wide game of hide-and-seek. No more established meet ups where you hope everyone remembers. Now it's easy to send your wife a quick text "Hey I'm going to the Alchemy bar for a drink while you spend two hours primping for Elegant Night!" or in my case, when my fiancé Lauren has a tray of food on lido and can't seem to find the table we are sitting at, "Hey Honey Bunny, we're six feet behind you!!! Stop panicking!"

Now there are going to be the Picard's out there who see these advancements in communication as ruining one of the greatest parts of  cruising- being disconnected from the world. I've already seen comments made on other message boards to the effect, "I put my phone in airplane mode and don't look at it again until we disembark." Or "I cruise to get away from my job! If I had access to my e-mails I'd be a slave on my vacation!" But fundamentally it's just an option given to you. By no means do you have to invest in being connected. I myself am on the fence on this topic. I enjoy for a week I don't feel that monkey on my back forcing me to check my Facebook account all the time. On the flip side- I have used post-it's, I have arranged meeting times, and I even tried walkie-talkies on one cruise. Communicating with those in your party onboard is truly one of the biggest pains in the rump. Post its fall off the surface they were stuck to and someone misses seeing them. Arranged meeting times only work if someone is wearing a watch and didn't fall asleep or get caught up in some fun. And walkie-talkies only work within a few decks of each other since the entire ship is made of signal absorbing steal. I am therefore ecstatic about this leap in shipboard communication and cannot wait for the opportunity to try out the group messenger feature of Carnival Hub. Will I invest in an internet package? I think I feel more like Captain Picard on this one!

Thanks for reading!! See you at sea!

Service our Service Men and Women?

This seems to be one of the bigger scenarios of frequent requests to cruise directors- Bending of rules for our military service men and women. Now first and foremost I want to get this out of the way- I have the utmost respect and admiration for anybody that chooses a career in our armed services, police, fire, and medical. I have a handful of friends and family who have served as well. I like to thank each of them for their service in maintaining our freedom's and protecting us. However does that job necessarily come with automatic perks in civilian life? [READ: Entitlements]

For any of you who read cruise boards, or notes to John Heald (or any other cruise directors you may follow); how many times have you see the request that sounds like this:

"My son (or daughter) is leaving for [insert branch of Military here] and we are taking one last vacation together on [insert date]. It's our last chance to spend some fun time together before they go into a career sacrificing and protecting the rest of us. I was hoping that because of their specialness that I could implore you to provide [insert special request here] and while you're at it we have 15 other people traveling with us can we all partake in [insert special request here] as this would make it special for my son (or daughter)."

Now there is always some variation to the letter and request but the basic foundation of the request is the same. Sometimes they want recognition on stage during a show, sometimes they want access to the Captain, sometimes they want cabin upgrades, etc. The question to me is this- Do cruise lines, and indeed any business in civilian life OWE these entitlements to service men and women? Is it even right that these requests are made (Often in this case) by the parents of said men and women?

In this writer's humble opinion the answer is no… and in talking with some folks that I know that have served, here is why: Common opinion is that its great if special perks and or entitlements are offered to individuals, but it dishonors the uniform in a way, if perks are just asked for or are expected. It's fabulous that many retailers and restaurants offer military discounts, but again these are OFFERED to the individuals, not asked for. Often times there are special military sales and discounts on cruises themselves… I don't follow the logic of why a cruise line should be expected to offer someone free tours, or free meals, or recognition on stage, or special meetings with the officers and captain of the ship. I think these requests are too bold and go too far, save for one- In the case of the adults-only areas of a ship where you must be 21 to access and enjoy, (Serenity Deck on Carnival cruise ships), I fully support a change in the rules that would allow for service men and women under 21 to use the space as well… though if you ask me I think anyone 18 and up should be allowed access to these facilities in general.

This might anger some parents but, I think if you want a treat for your son or daughter- it would mean more coming from you- pay for them to take a special tour, or pay for them to have an upgraded cabin or steakhouse meal. I would imagine your son or daughter would be even more thankful to you for what you provided them, than if you simply asked the cruise line to provide a handout.

To Lido? Or Not to Lido?

You've spent the night before running around your home (or hotel room) checking and double checking that you've brought everything from hair curlers to seasick medications. Sandals (or "man-dals" as my cruising companions LC and KC affectionately refer to them as) to sunscreen. You've filled out all your pre-cruise documentation and health screening attesting that you haven't travelled to a foreign land and contracted the rare West Mountain Llama Intestinal Viruses.  Next you've sat patiently in the cruise terminal as a drug-sniffing dog sniffs the crotch of the guy next to you, and the woman on the right ignores her screaming child. You've walked through the metal detector six times because each time you forgot to remove a coin, or keys, or other jewelry. AT LAST you are finally walking up the gangway and enter through the main atrium hatch!! What do you do FIRST?

Well for a vast majority it's a mad dash to get up to the Lido deck and begin scarfing down a bite to eat, or to the poolside bar to get your first "Drink of the Day". On embarkation day you almost need a strategy because this is the one day of your cruise where not only is almost EVERYONE up there, but most of them are also sporting some baggage in the form of any bags they carried on with them. Finding a spot to sit and have some lunch with your group can be rough.

Here are a few items to do instead of following the grazing masses up to Lido:

1)            Take the opportunity to discover the ship layout, find your cabin (even if it's not prepared yet at least knowing where it is can be helpful). There are so many venues and lounges around a cruise ship (not to mention bars off the beaten-path!) Find a quiet little nook of the ship and slip a bartender an extra tip and he/she will be amazed how much better the drinks are for the rest of the week! For instance on the Spirit-class cruise ships there is the little known interior promenade walks. On Pride (YES I know I talk about her a lot!) it's called the Sunset Garden decorated to make you feel you are walking among a Tuscan estate, with couches and Bistro Tables sprinkled along the way. I've not often encountered fellow cruisers here, so it you like peace and quiet this is a great spot!

2)            Plant yourself right in the Main Atrium with a drink and do some good old fashioned relaxing while people-watching. It's always fun to point out the newer cruisers because they always have the most open-mouthed stares or grins!

3)            Venture over to the Main Dining Room, on some lines they offer embarkation day lunch. Some of the newer mega-ships with a myriad of new dining options offer lunches and tastes from around the world. Japanese Sushi restaurants, Mexican Burrito Bars, and Italian Kitchens, etc. Not all the food is up on Lido!

4)            If you have ventured to the Main Dining Room, now is a great opportunity to check your seating assignment (assuming you're not on an Any Time Dining program), ask for seat moves (They assigned you to a six top, but you and the wife want a romantic table for two), or advise the of any dietary restrictions you may have (Vegetarian, Peanut Allergy, Lactose Intolerant, Gluten-Free). I remember when LC was first diagnosed with the need for a Gluten-Free diet, she dragged us to the MDR on the Carnival Dream and we stood in a line ten miles long for her to tell them her dietary needs. Mostly the line was full of folks wanting window seats or tables for two, or had been assigned seating, GASP! with strangers! Cruise lines and crew members are only too happy to accommodate you if you tell them your needs (politely)! So often I read reviews where a person was angry that the ship didn't offer enough options for their vegan diet, or the chocolate melting cake was baked in the vicinity of nuts. It's amazing how much more a cruise ship can accommodate you…When you communicate with them ahead of time! 

5)            This was a new fun idea I recently came across and I intend to try. Hold a Scavenger Hunt with your group! If you have a large group, have them pair off and find or take pictures of items around the ship. For example- A fellow passenger frantically in search of their passport rummaging through a bag or If you see a woman in a bikini before guests have access to their cabins, or if you see that one Party Cruiser who is already visibly intoxicated trying in uselessly to hide their drink. Make it fun, assign point values, and offer some sort of reward after dinner!

6)            Locate the Ship's coin! It's an old nautical tradition that calls for every ship to carry a coin to signify good luck and safe voyages. Often times the coin is welded to the hull before the ship can ever touch water. Can you find the commemorative coin on your cruise ship?

7)            If you've had enough of people watching, head up to your cabin. Typically your cabin will be ready for you after 1:30. This offers a good time to drop your carry-ons (sometimes your checked luggage has arrived already) and begin to unpack and make your cabin home for the week. If you have a balcony you can sit out and see the sights of the home port you are in. Or if you've had a long flight maybe it's time to sneak in a nap before the Muster Drill.

 As you will discover all week long on your cruise- there is something for everyone to do! That's true even during the craziness of Embarkation Day. So while you're sitting in line in the cruise terminal imagining what comes next, it doesn't have to be run to Lido and fight for a table or space! The party is just getting started- pace yourself!

Thanks again as always for reading!

Pride is Coming Home!!

As the title suggests, I'm a big fan of Carnival Pride. She was the first vessel I sailed on, and have sailed on three times now with a fourth cruise coming in September. She's not the biggest ship, nor the smallest. I think the Spirit class are the perfect sized ships with a smart layout. I've sailed aboard the Carnival Glory as well as Carnival Dream- and Pride was the only one of the three that you could traverse Forward (front) to Aft (rear) on every deck. I remember my time on the Glory we were confused a few times trying to get to dinner in the main dining room walking up one floor then down another then up, then down before arriving at the entrance to the dining room! It didn't make much sense to me. And even on Dream you run into the same issue but not as much. It hall of course has to do with the placement of the main galley on a ship. But I always liked that on Pride I can walk front to back no matter what deck I'm on.
I was excited when they announced that her stay in Tampa wasn't going to be permanent. Now after a three week dry-dock this past October/November and a few months sailing out of Tampa; she is finally sailing her repositioning cruise back to Baltimore (Where she belongs!). With her return, she is bringing a host of new 2.0 upgrades along with her to spice up the voyages. Here's what I am most excited to see:

Guy's Burger Joint- I'm pretty sure this is one of the more popular of the "Funship 2.0" features popping up in the fleet. It marries pop-culture Food Network star Guy Fieri with free poolside made-to-order burgers and fresh cut french fries and all the fixins' you can fit in a bun! In fact one of the reasons I took a cruise on the Carnival Dream was because I had understood that she had the 2.0 upgrades already, sadly Guy's Burger Joint was not one of the upgrades! So I eagerly await my cruise upcoming in September when I can FINALLY gorge myself in true stereotypical American fashion and get, what I've heard are amazing, artery clogging, beefy mounds of goodness!

PSA: To my fiance Lauren, don't worry I'm still excited for the wedding on Pride, but ... GUYS BURGERS! haha

Blue Iguana Cantina- Now I suppose Lauren (known as "LC" moving forward because I'm lazy and well that's her nickname!) is actually more excited for this than I. Here is where you come to get fresh made burritos, taco's, salsa, guac.. (yuck). What I've also learned is that you can get free breakfast burritos as well which I'm more likely to try. I'm not a huge burrito fan, and all these burrito factories popping up all over the place like Neato Burrito, Qdoba, Moe's, Chipotle, etc I'm just not a huge fan of. Sure you can get a burrito the size of a baby's head... but cut it open and you find a bunch of rice and lettuce... and then like Subway you find a few bits of meat craftily hidden amongst the filler! Here's to hoping Carnival gets it right! Either way I expect LC, despite her Gluten-Free diet will find herself chowing down many burrito bowls that week.

Bonsai Sushi- I am also very excited for this venue as well. Even though it's not a free one, I don't mind paying because I LOVE Sushi! We go out for sushi pretty often at home, and have made use of the sushi carts on prior cruises (despite the lame hours they used to be open... which I think was 5-5:05 then again 5:15- 5:19 and then 5:30- 5:45 before dinner haha.) But now Carnival is doing sushi properly with a full service sushi venue on Pride. I even like that they decided to put it down on Deck 2 close to the main Atrium. There is enough food options on Lido Deck! I like that they are adding eateries on other decks with new builds and dry-docks! I foresee myself adding a hefty sum to my Sail and Sign account on this one!

Library Bar- I think this one is one of the lesser known, and lesser marketed additions for the 2.0 upgrades amongst the ships, but one that I am actually very excited for nonetheless. It's a cozy, quieter space where you can get full bar service or get your own self-serve wine at a dispensary! Such a cool idea I think. The reason I like this little spot is because I'm actually one of the quieter cruisers. I'm not usually found where the action is, I like places where I can sit back relax maybe read a book, stare out a window and just be. So this is the ideal place for me to hang out. Would be a great place to meet up before dinner and grab a drink as well. People may laugh at me but while I was aboard the Dream I discovered this room off the mid-ship dining room called the Rendezvous Lounge- it was all done up in masculine leather library chairs and had a tiny little bar in the corner, wood tables, real masculine. IT WAS ALWAYS EMPTY! I loved coming here to read or just hang out.

Red Frog Pub-  This venue sort of speaks for it's self. In the theme of a Key West pub, this is where you begin to get in the Caribbean spirit sampling Rum and Tequila and Carnival's own brand of Red Frog beer (which is actually pretty good though I still prefer Guinness or Sam Adams...) But this is a fun venue built where the old Starry Night lounge (which I think was one of Pride's ugliest rooms!) once was. On a handful of ships you can also order pub fare such as wings, and sliders, etc however this was not to be on Pride. This is strictly a watering hole and place to congregate for live music and a game of Foosball. I think this will be one of the livelier venues aboard Pride now and as I understand it, one of the more popular 2.0 upgrades fleet-wide.

Now Pride also got a host of other upgrades as well in dry-dock but these were the ones that stuck out most to me. Notably she is also the first Spirit-class ship to get the addition of a Lido deck movie screen (scaled down of course compared to her Conquest and Dream class counterparts) that you can catch movies under the stars and free popcorn for that drive-in movie experience.
As part of the planning process for our wedding in September we get to take an 'inspection tour' of the Pride in May with a wedding coordinator to see the various venue's where the ceremony and reception take place. I've heard rumors that some wedding groups have gotten access to free lido lunch during these tours... so MAYBE I will get to sneak in a Guy's burger before we sail! I'll provide pictures from that experience afterwards!

Now I think there's time for another installment of  

"Shit my fellow cruisers say!"

I will steal a comment or concern that I find and then I will respond to it in a manner I'm sure the vast majority out there would! Something I always wanted to do during my own days in retail. Here we go:

Guest writes, "This request is for my booking ****** on the Carnival Liberty. I suffer from serious claustrophobia and have a doctor's letter and evidence to back me up. I have asked for an [read: FREE] upgrade to a balcony but have had no cooperation from Carnival. This is terrible care and customer service. Can something be done for me because I just cannot stay in a cabin with no window or with a balcony and cannot afford to book an upgrade to one???" 

Now first and foremost I have the deepest sympathy for anyone who suffers from fears and phobias. I myself have a fear of heights and often get dizzy looking down when in a tall building, or observation tower, etc. So you know what I do?? I DON'T LOOK DOWN! I do not have sympathy for a person however, that uses their issue to get hand outs. I'm sure there are many claustro-phobes who book cruises and you know what they do? They book what they NEED and PAY for it with the money they saved up. 

"Dear Sir, I am sorry we will not be able to provide you free upgrades on account of your claustrophobia, I myself suffer from acrophobia and understand how handicapping it can be. Indeed my doctor wrote me a letter expressing the need for my own private jet with seats built only in the center so I wouldn't be able to see down while flying. Sadly Gulfstream still wanted to bill me $64 million to have the jet. I do hope you will be able to come back and sail with us when you've saved the proper amount for a Balcony cabin!"

Guest writes, "I am a platinum VIFP with Carnival and ELITE Class with Celebrity. Here are some of the perks we get with them that Carnival MUST offer if they expect to keep guests loyal. Free Internet, Free Coffee from the specialty coffee shops and 50% discount at their restaurants where fees apply- 50% Discount! On our next cruise, we will reach Zenith level, that will mean a private lounge for cocktails before dinner. I have 11 cruises now with Carnival, but perks are why loyal cruisers keep cruising and I think Carnival falls miles behind here. There must be more that differentiates us from other non-loyal passengers who are not the same level as me."

OK flat out, Carnival's loyalty program is NOT (yep I'm a cheerleader saying this) NOT that awesome. But I still find a problem with the overall tone and attitude cruisers like this exhibit. First, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU and WHY are you so damn special? Did it occur to you that perhaps I'm not at your level simply because I started cruising 10 years later than you and not because I'm not "non-loyal"? Secondly, while perks do entice people to continue using ANY product, many come back out of sheer habit and comfort? Example for you: I have bought five Honda cars in my lifetime, and I get NO perks for being a return buyer, I keep buying them because I enjoy the product and it's become my comfort go-to. Not everyone sails ANY line simply because of the rewards program and I dislike the folks that use this line of reasoning. Sure I do think the VIFP program has LOADS of room for improvement. I'm just not the type that really pays that much attention to rewards programs. I sail for love of being at sea, I sail because I think it's overall a better vacation that going to the brackish brown waters of beaches nearby. I proudly sport my gold card but don't look down on those with Red or Blue at all. I wouldn't want to be stuck on a boat with a person that thinks himself better than me simply because he's beaten me to some imaginary level before me... ugh these people grind my gears. In fact it's folks like this, with this "I'm specialer than others" mentality that has some Platinum and Diamond level cruisers ashamed of having reached the top of the rewards chart. They genuinely just love cruising and have achieved these levels because they've sailed many times and love it. However there's a stereotype that continues to build each year that people who reach these levels are self-entitled snobs. As a result the truly nice Diamonds and Platinum's stuff their cards in a pocket out of sight instead of brandishing it like a flag! It's actually sort of sad.

"Dear Sir, Please continue to sail with Celebrity... that is all."

Well I think that's enough prattling for one day, as always thank you for reading. Also I would LOVE to hear from you, I got some great Facebook responses regarding the coloring of this blog and made changes that I hope still keep it nautical feeling, but easier to read! Thanks for the suggestions! If there's a topic you'd like me to touch on, or you come across some "Shit my fellow Cruisers Say" that you'd like to share or have me share, PLEASE feel free!
Thanks and stay Tuned!

New fun for the fun ship Vista

Welcome and THANK YOU for visiting my first cruise blog. My fiance (soon to be wife) has been telling me I should write about cruising for a long time now, so having a few extra minutes and a nerd-like interest in the cruise industry I have decided to take her up on the suggestion. 

So a little about me, my name is Ryan and I have a fondness for cruising and life at sea. I took my first cruise in 2010 and have been hooked ever since. My actual experiences have all been on Carnival ships (Specifically to date- The Pride, Glory, and Dream) but I try to keep up on all cruise-ish news. If my writings seem Carnival-centric it's because it's what I'm most familiar with and I enjoy the product tremendously. I've been labelled a 'cheerleader' on another site full of opinionated...'CRITICal enthusiasts'. It's not that I am a die-hard fan of just Carnival, but of cruising in general. I also understand how businesses in the 21st century work. I have noticed the dreaded 'cutbacks' even from 2010 when I first cruised. However I understand that things need to change (not always for the better) in order to maintain cost and marketability. (And there's always the unadvertised aspect of "We had to cut this in order to keep the CEO's bonus at the same level or higher") Businesses are all subject to a bottom line and a desire to MAKE MONEY while still providing something people like. I get it. I am a fan of Carnival's product and for now it's good enough for me. I also enjoy Carnival's Ambassador John Heald, I think he's entertaining and for the most part he provides good information most of the time. And I am sympathetic to a lot of the 'letters' he gets from cruisers. I know he's not making this stuff up because I've worked in the service industry and I've heard customers ask similar things. So there ya go, I appreciate the brand and the product.

 But I'm not going to lie, I have the desire to sail other brands in the future. (Dying to try one of the Oasis class ships!) But for me I'm simple, I don't need lots of bells and whistles. I simply LOVE being at sea, sitting in a chair or at the railing and watching the ocean pass. I love waking up in a new port and seeing a new place. 

So there's my disclaimer. You may now continue on to the article. I sincerely hope you enjoy, and I look forward to hearing from you as well.

With the introduction to the new Carnival Vista debuting in 2016, comes many new and exciting bells and whistles. Some of the things I'm looking forward to on this new ship include:

The Kaleidoslide

  Carnival's first tube-shaped slide running 455 feet made up of translucent colored sections that spins the rider around and around until arriving in a fun splash pool at the bottom. Now I know what you guys are thinking, "It's just a regular water slide, and many ships at sea already have them Ryan..." and you're right. It's not wilder, it's not un-tried, it's not daring. But what it is, at least to me, is fun. I'm a big kid that loves a good water slide, and when you find one that instead of being the usual opaque dark cavern-like is actually light and fun, I get excited! DARN YOU Carnival! Praying on my inner child like that!! Now I imagine that on any given sea day, on a vessel carrying almost 4,000 passengers the line will be about forty children long, and a dozen rather plump parents sipping on a 'Bay Breeze' while scouting for an open round chair on the Serenity Deck...and then me.. at the end... waiting till Guy's Burgers opens up, then I move on.

The Red Frog BREW Pub

 Now Red Frog Pub's have been on Carnival ships since the introduction of the the Carnival Magic, and have since been installed into many of the older vessels as well. What is new for Carnival is that they will now be BREWING beer at sea in the Pub on board the Vista. This comes as a result of the surge in micro-breweries nationwide creating demand for new flavors and tastes of beer. In a pointing-out-the-blatantly-obvious kind of statement, "Our guests love beer, and they love trying new things," says Eddie Allen, the line's vice president for beverage operations. Yes Eddie, I'm sure much time and research went into discovering that passengers on Carnival Funships, a line known for it's Spring Break Crowd, like Beer...

 The brewpub will feature holding tanks for the house-made beer located near its entrance that passengers will be able to touch as they walk in. The fermentation tanks where the beer is brewed will be in the back behind the glass, and the line also is building a grist mill on a lower deck to process the grains needed for the brewing process.

"We're milling everything on site," Allen says. "We want to be sure we're putting our heart into this beer and making the best product we can." 

So this is good news to anyone that EVER lived in fear that the ship might run out of beer before week's end...which I'm sure was no one...ever.

The First IMAX at Sea

  A three-story IMAX theater at sea that will be showing first-run movies.Not going to lie... I have mixed feelings about IMAX at sea. I mean from the aspect of attracting people with the lure of another feature not found often on other cruise ships I get it. However to my mind, it just doesn't make much sense. I've paid all these thousands of dollars for a week of vacation in the sun and such... and I'm choosing to spend it in a darkened room watching a movie I could have seen at home...before I left. I love movies, don't get me wrong. But at sea I just feel like there are so many better uses of my time. I suppose this one is just a sign of the times. I might even go to it once for the novelty.

 I think this whistle will serve a few under-served market segments onboard. For years now I've read people write to John Heald begging for activities for the 18-21 year olds who are too old for the Circle C teen activities, and are too young to drink or hang out on Serenity Deck with the adults. (News Flash...if you don't wave your hands screaming you're under 21, no one on Serenity Deck notices you're there... shut up and enjoy yourself.)

And of course the teens who've met up in Circle C but have no where to go make out! Now they can get a ticket to the IMAX theater and have some privacy! No longer worrying about disrespecting their mom's "no one strange in the cabin" rules! So basically theater at sea today will be just like the theaters their parents spent Sunday matinee's in growing up!

The Havana Experience

 This is a feature I am actually looking very much forward to. The Havana themed bar and pool area. This antebellum Cuban style bar area featuring both indoor and outdoor space is a first for the line. It features live music, fun foods, and a private (by day) pool area for those staying the in the adjoining Havana cabins. Take in great ocean views as you taste something authentically Cuban: café Cubano (that’s Cuban coffee!), handcrafted cocktails of Cuban origin (think daiquiris, mojitos and more), or Cuban pastries. If you've spent any time at all looking at the Vista's deck plans you may or may not have noticed that there is no ship's disco anymore. I am certain that is in part because of this new area they are introducing on the Vista. Having been on a handful of cruises now I can say that I've visited the ship's disco areas a few times and every time it seems like a dead space. There are always a handful of bar-rats hanging by the bar, a handful of 'Woo' Girls dancing in a circle being watched by the bar-rats, but otherwise it's a pretty empty venue. Here on the Vista in the Havana Bar with it's live music and both tables, and open spaces to get up and groove I think we will see this replace the old disco.And if you think about it, what is the point of going to the ship's disco to dance on a cruise ship anymore? There is usually live music being played somewhere on the promenade decks or near the casino. Or there is a party happening on lido.

There's no longer a need to have a dedicated spot for dancing, especially one a Carnival ship, where there is certainly some thing happening with music and dancing anywhere else on the ship. I'd bet you a Tequila Sunrise that as ships continue to get built and older ships get renovated that we will see more and more of these disco's disappear in favor of more multipurpose areas like the Havana Bar on Vista.

There's also another cool part about the Havana area of the ship and that is the adjoining staterooms that run along the lanai to the outdoor pool area. Here the classic Cuban theme continues in the decor of these cabins. In the effort to continue new use for the poorly used Lanai's of previous ships (Ahem Dream, Magic, and Breeze) Carnival is launching first-ever cabins with walkout patio areas that have access to the Lanai. I am pretty excited by this concept because your traditional balcony gets a bit of an upgrade. You have some shaded area, as well as some sun lounging area and now you can have your own lazy hammock to complete the quintessential lazy day at the beach feel while at sea. However, I think it only a matter of time before someone writes to John Heald and complains that they felt they had no privacy while sunning themselves on these decks. "John my experience was ruined because people kept walking by me while I was trying to lay on my balcony! Do you know they had the nerve to look at me?! I paid for a private room and I had people walking by me all afternoon!" And it will be true because these balconies have a gate that gives you access write onto the Lanai where you can walk on down to the Havana pool, or bar. These cabins are definitely awesome... but not for anyone who desires copious amounts of privacy.

There are many other new facets of the Vista that will no doubt be spot-lighted as things continue to develop, but these are a few of the things I thought were cool. I think it will be a cool new ship that will finally make the best use of the lanai running along the promenade deck, space which was more or less wasted on prior Dream class vessels. I look forward to one day sailing aboard her. 

This brings me to another segment I'd like to experiment with, which I endearingly call-

 "Shit my fellow cruisers say..."

Here I will post items I've found around the interwebs from my fellow cruise passengers and attempt to respond to them in a manner... they deserve... (=O)

Our first post is borrowed from John Heald's blog from a cruiser who wants to feel more important...

Woman writes, "I find it strange and yes insulting actually, that Carnival does not have a private return party for Platinum VIP's like me and my DH. We were on the Celebrity Solstice last week and had our first cruise at Elite level and they gave us a private cocktail reception. Compare this with the one on the Carnival Freedom where we were herded like cattle into the big theater with all the other cruisers who were not Platinum. I saw mostly Gold colored cards which was unsettling. I think Carnival should do more for us like Celebrity took the time to do. Just sayin." 

I will NEVER understand the folks that think they need private attention paid to them simply because they reach certain levels in a rewards program. We've all read similiar requests, everything from this woman asking for a Platinum only party, to a Platinum Dining Room. Seriously- you just want to say "Dear Woman- thank you for reaching a higher level on our MASS MARKET cruise line, might I suggest that if you are as special as you clearly think you are, perhaps you should sail exclusively on private yachts and ultra-luxe cruises? Your attitude towards your fellow cruisers brandishing different colored cards is demeaning. Please take a look in the mirror, learn some humility, and appreciate what is given to you. Thank you and have a nice future.

Woman writes "I am part of a group of 18 cabins booked on the Carnival Conquest 9/21. We are all huge NY Giants fanatics and need assurances that the boat will show the game with the Falcons on 9/25. This would have a serious negative impact on our cruise if you guys do not show this and there will be 32 very angry people. What assurances can you give me that we will have the game shown and on the giant screen?" 

So... not only is she demanding that Carnival find a satellite feed for her specific game, but then she goes on to dictate that it must be presented on the big screen on deck. Really? So you're sailing on a vessel carrying over 3,000 people, but the desires of your group of 32 must take precedence to normal ship programs and possibly the desires of thousands of other guests? And if you don't get what you want you might kick and scream like a 2 year old who also didn't get it's way? Have you heard of DVR? It can be PROGRAMMED while you are away! This entitlement age we live in gets out of hand.  "Dear Woman, I'm sorry to inform you that unfortunately we do not allow our passengers to dictate what is presented on any of our seaside movie screens. This policy is in place to remind passengers that they are not in charge and should just plan on having a good time disconnected from the world. Please remember your place in the world. Also, we have a group of 35 who already asked that we play the Patriots game... sorry."

Woman writes, "Are you aware of the video game selection in the games room on Carnival Pride? They all do nothing but glorify death and destruction and I would be surprised if I am the only parent who will lobby Carnival cruises to ban these horrid vile games! Violence and death are trivialized in these games and Carnival is anesthetizing our children to death by having them available." 

So... have you been in a video game store lately? I'm not sure if you're aware or not, but copies of "Dorothy the sugar fairy" aren't flying off shelves in favor of the strategy involved in deciding if your fairy will use a wand or fairy dust to grow magic bean stalks... 

This is the sad reality of our culture... Call of Duty, Far Cry, HALO, etc are the games that sell and kids WANT to play. It becomes a parents duty then to TEACH them the difference between playing an imaginary character that kills bad guys and aliens, and being a REAL person and NOT killing people on the street. No different than when I was young and my father took me to my first R-rated film and explained both before and after that this was all make-believe and this wasn't how life really worked. It is not Carnival's duty to PARENT children... it's a cruise line's duty to provide what people WANT, (and what will make them a tidy profit! Hmm I can make $300/day with kids playing Call of Duty or.... $20/day on kids playing "Call of the Garden, grow your magic Tomatos"

Well that's all the time we have today! I hope you enjoyed and continue to read! Please stay tuned for more!